American Idiot
by darkguardian15
Summary: Pretty much the story as a novel, some minor changes
1. Tales of Another Broken Home

**Tales of Another Broken Home**

I could see a girl she was young with blond hair, and she was looking up at my window, like she was waiting for me. My heart dropped as I realized it was her, and I flew down the stairs of my apartment building like a bullet.

"Jesus, you look older" She said when she saw me.

Then I woke up. Plain and simple I finally get to see her again and it turns out to only be a dream. I finally get a chance to make amends for my idiotic behavior a year ago, but even in my dreams I can't. I still hope I will run into her one day, but if I do I probably won't recognize her, since I burnt all of the pictures of her. She was everything to me the love of my life and I lost her. She just disappeared without a trace and now I don't even remember whatsername. I do remember the story though, so I guess I should start a year back.

One year prior:

"I'm so fucking tired of living in this redneck hell hole of a town!" I screamed at my mother

"That's no way to talk to your mother" Said Brad

"Shut the hell up" I yelled "You're not my father."

With that I stormed out of the house. I hated it here, but I had nothing else, so the second my mom and Brad left the house I snuck back in. I grabbed a Mountain Dew from the frige and sat in the living room and watched TV. I must have fallen asleep at some point though cause' I woke in my arm chair while 1,000 Ways to Die was wrapping up. The wardens still weren't home though, so I went through the mail and found an other notice of foreclosure, right next to it was, you guessed it, a shopping receipt for 500$ all spent on booze, and cigarettes. I needed to get out of this place bad, so I pack all my junk up and left.

Okay so the next chapter will be longer I promise but I have to make a chapter break here. BTW my other fic was on hiatus, cause I lost my story line for it but im starting to re work it it'll get done eventually


	2. The Center of the Earth

Ok I lied this chapter is going to be short because I have to get Jesus out of the town he lives in before I can start the Holiday Section, so that means I have to cover this part. Quickly before the story picks up pace

**The Center of the Earth**

On the list of stupid things I've done this top it, I ran away and now I'm trying to hitch a ride from the parking lot of a 7-11. Normally this wouldn't be to bad cause' it's a 7-11 so it should be packed, except its 1:00 AM. Anyway it got cold out so I went into the store pretending to need to use the bathroom. I soon as I got in there I locked the door to my stall, and the whole thing was covered in graffiti. I read some of it and the sad part is it wasn't wasted ramblings there was truth behind it. It said stuff like "Welcome to the City of Dead", "The Center of the Earth is the End of the World", and "The Motto is Just a Lie". Then there is one that said "Home is Where the Heart is", I added to this one "Well What a Shame Cause' Every One's Heart Doesn't beat the same.

"Hey kid wake the fuck up and get the hell outta my store" Yelled some guy, probably the shop owner.

"I don't care" I responded. I was promptly thrown out. So I wondered down the road for a little bit until I found some one willing to take me to the city. I climbed in the car and took a piece of paper and pen and began to write a letter.

_Dearly Beloved, _

_Are you listening? I can't remember you trying to get me stay, so I'm gone. Maybe I'm the one who is fucked up but I doubt it. Maybe you can get therapy to fill the space I'll leave. So I run I run away and I leave behind all of your lies. I don't feel any shame I won't apologize, you left me with no other option. This concludes the tales of a broken home. _

_-J.C_

Finally I was off, off to the city.

- - okay so now Jesus is out of his home town and I'm going to start the Holiday sequence next, I have some but they are minor characters that just have to exist for the story to make sense. The next chapter should be longer, but I'm in the middle of finals so Idk if that will prove true.


	3. To Dream and Differ

Okay we have arrived in the city time for a holiday.

**To Dream and Differ**

New Years Eve the holiday for the drunkards and boozers, by 11:00 even the bartenders are hammered enough to believe that a 17 year old is of the legal age.

"Hey, whatsur name der sunny." slurred the bartender, " Nevermine I won member any way. You sober".

"Yeah" I answered

He laughed. "Well arnt you like Jesus, comin on dow here amongst us mordal men, all igh an mighty knowing what you doing. Where you from?"

"Suburbs" I answered.

"Well ain dat quaint, da frigging Jesus of Suburbia, as come to drink of covnet. Here" he said as he thrust a shot glass into my hand. I downed it with out thinking twice, it seared my throat on the way down.

"Reload" I said

Reload. Reload. Reload. Reload. After downing enough shots to wear in a belt like Rambo, I started preaching like I was Jesus.

"DO YOU HEAR DAT PEOPLE. It is the flames of hell descending upon us" It was really only a rainstorm. "But fear not for, the only thing that is in heaven is faith and misery. I'd rather laugh with the sinners and die with the saints." Everyone cheered at this line.

"I dream and differ from the lies of society. Will you join me?" More applause.

"This is the dawning of the rest of our lives, revolt against society's broken standards. We will punish all those who don't agree."

"AMEN" shouted the crowd.

I woke up the next morning still in the bar, and everyone else was gone. I headed out side and realized I had been mugged to add to the pain of the hangover I was just begging to feel.

"Son of a bitch" I groaned. My head was throbbing. Thankfully, it was New Year's Day so most of the city was still asleep. I passed by a couple of stores, I finally passed one shop that had a flier in the window. It was a missing child poster, with my name on it. Perfect, I thought, they give a crap about me after I leave. There was no picture, but I was going to need a new name. Thinking back to my last memory of the previous night, I remember the bartender referring to me as the Jesus of Suburbia. It seemed to fit so I rebaptised myself as the Jesus of Suburbia.


	4. Read Between the Lines

This story is going well for me so im gonna try to get to by the end of the week.

**Read Between the Lines**

I walked down the boulevard for a little while longer, and all the while I realized how lonely I was. At least Jesus had disciples to follow him around; all I had, was my goddamned shadow. It got dark real quickly since it was winter and this time there was no 7-11 to break into, so I found my self a nice little alley way with some other people, who were smoking.

"Hey kid, you want a hit" one of them asked.

"I'm gonna guess that's not a cigarette," I was going to refuse but I really wanted some company so I accepted it, this was probably the worst mistake of my life, "Thanks, what's your name?"

"Tuney," he responded "and this is Will" pointing to the other dude.

"Names Jesus" I said

"Christ?" Will asked while laughing

"Surburbia" I responded, a little distantly, I was starting to feel the drug taking affect.

"So what brings you to old Tuney's dope shack" asked Tuney

"Dunno" I said the drug was now at full force, "got tired of having to live at home. The next thing I could hear was sirens piercing the night.

"Jesus, get out of here before you get caught, you still have hope of getting out of this life" commanded Will

So I ran as fast I could, one of the best things about being stoned is you really don't need to breathe while you run , the worst part is the sudden tiredness that follows. Anyway I was alone again back on the boulevard, and now the drug was bring me to more depressing thoughts. All the broken dreams I had, and the unbearable thought of going back home. Then the worst thought of all came, my father, not Brad, my bio dad. When I was three my dad ended himself with a shotgun blast to the head, he finally let the rage he felt towards the world get the best of him, a rage I inherited.

Now I walk this empty street on the boulevard the boulevard of broken dreams and the last thought that entered my head before I passed out was how I hope someone out there finds me, because this loneliness was unbearable.

Okay so I normally don't add an author's note after a chapter but I would like to inform everyone that I will be including the two B-sides in the story, the songs are part of the storyline in the alblum but are deleted scenes per say the first one takes place after She's a Rebel.


	5. The Rage and Love: Story of My Life

Okay you can thank Sheena is a Punk Rocker for this chapter cause I was gonna skip it and go right to . BTW if you have a problem with this story review and let me know I might change some stuff if I agree this chapter is a perfect example. You will Probably get to see today though because im done with finals

**The Rage and Love: Story of My Life**

It's been days since I started smoking, I'm hooked, and now I'm more alone than ever, I'm waiting for someone to save me. I closed my eyes and took another puff. I never noticed how the skyscrapers seem to stare down at you before, like the demigods who think they run this country. How did I get into this mess, I thought, but it's too late for second thoughts. What am I waiting for, no one is coming for me, no one loves me that much and no one hates me enough to come after me. I am truly a lone in this town, maybe I should escape here too.

I blew more smoke, and continued to muse about my life. Maybe the Jesus of Suburbia is a lie, I'll never have any followers, the closet thing I had to followers were a whole shit load of drunks, and Tuney and Will. I wonder what happened to them.

"Hey Jesus" some one said and startled me, I began to cough the deep breath of smoke I took in.

"Tuney," I spluttered.

"The one and only" he responded as he sat down next to me.

"I thought the cops got you" I said blowing more smoke. I look over at him waiting for an answer, what I saw instead was a garbage can.


	6. A Teenage Assassin Executing Some Fun

Ok this Chapter might cause me to up the rating. The Drugs get heavier and Jimmy is… well Jimmy

**A Teenage Assassin Executing Some Fun**

I spent the rest of my night baked until I didn't know if I was awake or not.

I heard foot steps, which roused me out of my dreams. A kid about my age was walking towards me from across the alley that I called home.

"Hey, I saw you from the boulevard" he said "I'm Jimmy, what's your name?"

"Jesus of Suburbia" I responded. He laughed.

"Well if you're Jesus then I guess I'll be your first disciple, which would make me a Saint. St. Jimmy, I like the ring to that. Anyway let's go to a party."

"If I'm Jesus shouldn't I be giving the orders?"

"I'm insubordinate" he replied. "Come on". So I followed him and after a while we stopped at a convenience store, and he went inside, well broke in. Five minutes later he came back with cigarettes, ramen, and a little bag of dope. We continued walking until we saw a large field with a couple of bonfires lighting up the night.

"You are definitely not stoned enough" Said some chick with blonde hair "come on and join the party"

"Thanks, what's your name?" I asked "I'm the Jesus of Suburbia"

"And I'm the St. Jimmy, patron saint of being in denial" he laughed

"Loving the names, I'd tell you mine but I don't quite know what it is at this moment" she slurred. She walked away like we were supposed to follow her. "Welcome to the club", said Jimmy as we stumbled through the crowd


	7. Everything Will be Alright

Okay sorry for the long update interval week end hit, I was busy and had trouble writing another hang over chapter

**Everything Will Be Alright**

I woke up in an apartment which was odd because I didn't own an apartment, odder still was the fact that Jimmy was no where to be seen. Although the more I tried to remember last night the more a vague memory of Jimmy getting extremely pissed off and starting a huge brawl comes to mind so that probably explains his absence.

"Hey Jimmy, you up" a girls voice shouted

"Hey not so loud, I'm Jesus" I said "Jimmy's my friend who's MIA"

"Okay" She laughed in a hushed whisper. She walked into the room and sat down next to me.

"Ummm, where am I?" I asked

"My apartment" she said nonchalantly

"Ow" I groaned. "Watch the volume"

"Ok" she whispered back.

She left the room, and showered leaving me to feel like crap. I wished I was fucked up again so I didn't have to deal with this migraine. At this point any drug will do, I'd take novocaine just to take away the pain. I heard the shower water cease and I had to restrain my self from running into the bathroom to get some pills. It wasn't that I was being gentlemanly by not going in there before she was dressed, or that I was worried she'd hit me, I was worried she would scream, and aggravate my hangover worse. After an eternity of throbbing headaches she finally left the bathroom and I rushed in to grab whatever I could.

"Woah, slow down there boy, you need to breathe" she smirked

"Hey, according to Jimmy this is better than air"

"Jimmy seems to think that being fucked up to deal with pain is the best thing in the world" she said in a tone that surprised me. Was she actually being serious I couldn't believe it.

"Is there no better thing though?" I asked

"Yah there is"


	8. The Truth is Always Misconstrued

Okay do to similariteies in the songs and just the overall theme of JoS praising whatsername im combining she's a rebel and extrodairy girl, the chapter will also have elements of the B-side Too much too soon so hopefully this will be a long chapter.

**The Truth is Always Misconstrued**

The next days, or was it weeks, I really can't tell; seemed to fly by. I was falling for her and she was for falling for me. The love we shared was so much more powerful than the common hatred for the law me and Jimmy shared. Still I can't turn my back on my best friend despite the growing rift between us, so I made the excuses I could to her and went to the nearest party, which is naturally where Jimmy was.

"Hey Jesus what's up man" he said brightly as he punched some dude in the face.

"Nothing much, all though I think I caught feelings for a certain blonde"

"Ahh yes, how is old what's her name doing?" Jimmy asked uninterestedly as he sidestepped the other guy's next punch.

I rolled my eyes in response, then my mouth fell open in shock.

"Tuney" I exclaimed as I recognized Jimmy's foe.

"Took you long enough to come around Jesus" Tuney panted. "I felt like I was fighting for my fucking life"

"Hey Jimmy-" I turned just in time to see Jimmy stalk off angrily and disappear into the crowd. I could probably guess what was wrong with him now that, any drugs were starting to dissipate from my system.

"Hey Tuney, long time no see, where's Will?"

"Will joined the military. He's trying to quit this life, and so am I. I came looking for you because I had to find out if you were still using as its my fault. I guess I got my answer." He said sadly.

"It's not your fault someone else is keeping me in the fold" I consoled him

"Here's my cell number if you ever need help" He responded wearily as he handed me a piece of paper. "I need to go now."

Tuney left just like that, and he left behind the life he brought me into, I had I funny feeling that wouldn't be the last I see of him so I tucked his number into the pocket of my jeans, I then set off to find Jimmy…again.

He naturally was at the nearest table serving alcohol. I sat down and got an entire glass of Jack Daniels which I downed easily and then addressed Jimmy.

"What's going on man?"

"Nothing" he responded dryly. "I'm just enjoying my saint status. So tell me about this girl."

I could tell he didn't like her but I went on just to annoy him a little.

"She's a rebel, Jimmy."

"So am I"

"And she's a saint"

"Hey, that's in my name"

"She really loves fighting for what she believes in"

"So do I"

"No Jimmy, You just like to fight. There is a difference" I quipped

"Right I knew that. She sounds so extraordinary." He said sarcastically

"Jeez Jimmy, why do you hate her so much" I asked getting a little annoyed.

"Because she's getting to you, Jesus, since when do you give a flying fuck about what you believe in. We rebel because of what we hate not what we love."

"You know what Jimmy maybe if you didn't try to force your will constantly, I'd agree, but I want to rebel for my beliefs."

"You sound like such a wimp, talking like that"

"YOU'RE ONE TO FUCKING TALK. I mean all you do is get fucked up for no reason. This has all become too much Jimmy, all you do is talk shit about my girlfriend, and how it was so much better without her. What do you want from me?"

"I want my friend back; I want the Jesus of Suburbia."

"Well, it's too late, go to hell, Jimmy" I shouted angrily

"Fuck You" He screamed.

This time I stalked off leaving him behind.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N Okay I know it's been forever since I updated but between my Vacation and the lack of reviews I just couldn't get going but I am going to finish this story. This is going to be a very short chapter because its mainly the letter that Whatsername wrote. I'm sorry for the delay and then only getting a disappointing chapter but, I got busy writing and original story that, I have a lot of time invested in.

**Where Have All the Bastards Gone**

I hated Jimmy; my best friend had betrayed me just because he didn't approve of my girlfriend. That stupid son of a bitch.

I walked home by myself with a beer bottle in my hand, and some really strong pot in the other. By the time I got to the apartment, I was barely able to stand on my own to feet.

"Jesus what's wrong. You're really fucked up"

"That stupid Bastarrd Jeeemee" I slurred before passing out

I awoke the next morning on the floor where I passed out.

"Ugh" I groaned. I sat up and there was a note taped to my forehead.

_James,_

_You're not the Jesus of Suburbia, and Saint Jimmy is just a figment of your hatred for your step-dad and your love for your mother. He's not real, James, or he is but he's a part of you. You need to fix your life, and the fact that I help you screw it up makes me an idiot. I can't take this town and I'm leaving tonight._

The worst part about getting dumped this way was that I was always too high to remember her name.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Finally finished this chapter this is like the thirtieth re write Its short I know but It sets the stage for home coming which will be longer, and to be honest not much could be said about this part of the story similar two are we the waiting, its just musing and a ethics change.**

**Like My Father Come to Pass**

Time passed, seven years, twenty, thirty? I don't quite know. Time became arbitrary, it meant nothing. All I knew was that I started using when spring began, and now almost the end of August I had been clean since she left me. The wound still stung like hell when I thought about it.

I thought about a lot of things during this period of clarity, a lot about my father and sometimes Brad. These thoughts added to the pain but also made me face me. Jesus of Suburbia facing off against James Christian. The two sides of me.

After all this time and all this musing I felt the pain coming down like the rain, I wanted to rest, I wanted to use. I wanted to go asleep for all of September and wake up when it was over. But that would be running again, I had a job, but I still wasn't happy there was still something missing from me. Still something that needed to be resolved so on I went musing


	11. Chapter 11

Ok, I'm going to finish this story, within the next two weeks (tentatively)

**Stems and Seeds**

September came and went, without the relief I so desperately was hoping for; my heart was no longer a part of me. I had failed what I had set out to accomplish I was just another cashier without a diploma, without a hope of changing the world. I had lost my love and all I had left was my hate. Was going to waste more of my life?

I was always pondering this question, and the hazy memories of Jimmy and Whatsername began to resurface. Feeling nostalgic I went into my closet, and pulled out the black sweatshirt that was Jesus' tunic. A small almost empty bag fell out of one of the pockets. It was dope, the last bag I had bought, with only stems and seeds left in it. It was oddly comforting to see, like and friend had come back, and scared me. Still with out a second thought I tucked the little bag into my pocket and went on my way.

It was late now and I really didn't have any sense of direction, and for the first time in months I wished I was using again.

"What's the matter" a familiar voice asked from behind me.

"Jimmy?" I said recognizing the voice.

"The one and only, and what the hell's your name" he asked. "What's your pleasure, what's your pain? Did you think love was going to change the world? I think you dreamed a little too much, but hey I guess you do too?"

"You're not real and what are you talking about anyway?" I said defiantely.

"You're back on a crutch" Jimmy smirked. "Does it make you feel safe, just carrying it? Go on use it, rise again Jesus, it's been more than three days"

"You aren't real, you are a part of me" I shouted

"You're wrong there, we may be fucked up but we're not the same, and mom and Brad are the ones you can blame."

I took off running still Jimmy's voice echoed in my head. Finally I had reached the pier with no where else to run I reached into my pocket and withdrew the small Ziploc.

Standing over the edge of the bay I looked at my reflection in the water. Jimmy was looking back at me with a gun to his head. I understood then, and with no thought I dropped the bag into the water just as Jimmy pulled the trigger.

"By the way my name's James" I said and turned to leave.

I wish I could say that after Jimmy's death I felt whole and complete but I didn't. I was smoking cigarettes every chance I could get and living off coffee. I had no answers and my work was suffering. Then I got a letter that changed everything.

_Jesus, _

_I made it, I got a rock n' band and a girlfriend, Still no kids, funny considering you'd assume that I'd have one in LA and NY. Look though I've stayed clean, haven't drank or smoked a thing in a while and I had my agent track you to this job. I hope you are turning your life around and I am sorry for setting you on the path I did._

_-Tunney_

Great, I thought, Tunney gets his dream and I'm stuck here representing nothing, but do I. I thought to the biblical counterpart to my former alias. The real Jesus wasn't a rock star, he took others burdens from them, I finally had solution to my problem; I had to go home. Jimmy's words echoed on last time in my mind faintly as I turned toward the door.

"Go, fucking just go. I don't care"

So I went.


	12. Chapter 12

Ok, I'm going to finish this story, within the next two weeks (tentatively)

**Forgetting You But Not The Time**

"It's been five months since I returned, it was all tearful and I'm sorry and the media played it up. I used the media to my advantage; I needed to help other kids that were like me, lost in their own lives and that's why I'm today. That concludes my presentation, any questions?"

I watched as a wave of murmur rippled through the high school auditorium. A young girl raised her hand in the front row.

"Yes" I responded and the noise died down.

"What ever happened to the girl you were in love with?"

"Dunno, never saw her again" I said

The presentation was over and I had a couple of teacher swoon over my bravery, a concerned parent admonish me over my lack of censorship, and Brad come over and clap me on the shoulder.

"You all right?" he asked

"Fine, why"

"That girl's question got to yah, huh?"

I sighed and relented "Yah, I cant even remember her face even though I destroyed every picture before that September. Yesterday, I thought saw her, but it was dream, and I'm not sure I miss her. If she never left I'd still be on that path, and I wouldn't have helped anyone. Still part of me regrets, the fallout, but most of all I think I want closure I want to know what happened to her, did she ever marry? I can't even recall her name. The regrets are useless though, because in the darkest night, if my memory serves me right, I'll never turn back time and I'll forget her but not the time."


End file.
